Here’s a short story I just wrote. When you read it, I would recommend to pay attention and imagine the scene and actions presented, in order to get the whole idea and the feeling I want to express…
Trying to reach a star
Sitting in the wet grass because of the dew, Evie lay silently in the middle of the night. The girl was hypnotized with something up there, showing a strange look in her eyes. Her mind was on it completely and she didn’t really care of the wet grass. She was looking above, admiring the great blue sky full of shining spots. They looked great! And she was fascinated, wondering why she hadn’t noticed them before.
For the first time in her life Evie felt free. Free from duties, free from harm, from fear, from life. Free from routines, clocks, people talking, people walking, arguing, suffering. It was just Evie and the dark sky. Evie and the million stars shining only for her. How can people be watching TV while here’s such a great spectacle? How can people be immersed in loud music having here the greatest silence? How can people walk the streets and never notice this gorgeousness?
Agitation had passed, fear had too. Only life was still there. But it was not her life. It was a new life, a new period, a new beginning. It was her life now, her way, her path, her decisions. No one was taking care of her, no one felt the way she did. Evie was sitting in the dewed grass, but still didn’t care about the cold she was starting to feel. She was exchanging some words with a great landscape, while silence was sitting next to her, and meditation protecting her. Evie’s head, a whole though, a whole new experience, a million thoughts, a million new discoveries.
Paulo, Mary, Jack, Sheila passed by. Her dead mother, her dog, school. Then the sea, some great vacations, an apartment, homework, future. A boy, her cousin, her grandfather, Cinderella’s book, her drawing of Mickey Mouse. Images came and went, flew through the stars; one followed by the other. And then she stopped at one shining dot that caught her attention. Evie saw a known face on it. Was it her mother? Could it be possible? Evie hadn’t seen her for a few months, so the face was a bit different. It had so much more life that the very last time she had seen her..! She was… different. A big and tender smile, the same brown eyes, same friendly look, same wrinkles in her frown. She was not supposed to be on earth anymore, so definitely, she could be up there! Her mother was on that star!
Evie lifted her arm, but got nowhere. How she missed her! How she wished to reach the star, her mother’s star. Her arm went down again, touched the wet grass and she quickly dried it with her pants. Evie could almost hear her mom saying ‘Don’t do that! Your pants will get dirty!’ It was her voice! Definitely. She hadn’t heard that tone for some months… but now it was the same, just the same one. How she missed her... she thought. But life is like that and she was now starting to face it, to understand it, to accept what it presents. Evie missed her mom anyway, and she knew she could reach it… Her face was so alive, so real, so hers.
With tears on her eyes she lifted her arm slowly again. Little by little the slim arm went up, getting nearer… And a frightening loud shout broke completely everything. It was her father’s angry tone:
- Evangeline! What are you doing out there?! The grass is wet, it’s cold! Are you going mad? Why do you lift your arm like that?!
She wasn’t going to answer that she was trying to reach a star. Not even that she was about to reach her mother. Silently, she let the tears roll down her face and fall on her pants. The same pants her mother had mended with so much love.
- Evangeline, come in now!
She didn’t want to come in. She didn’t want nothing and nobody else than her mother.
- Evangeline! I’m telling you to come here, now! Don’t you listen when I talk to you?
- I’m going - stuttered the girl, passing her sweater sleeve through her eyes.
- Hurry up! Now!
She only wanted to cry. To go back to the dewed grass, to the silence, to the sky, to peace, to her mother. “They’re adults, they just don’t understand anything”, she affirmed to herself, “only my mom understands me.” And how she missed her…